Why “Owing Your Family” is a Part of Filipino Culture

WRITTEN BY FRANCESA JANA SANTIAGO

Ever heard of “Utang Na Loob”? If you haven’t then you’re obviously not from a Filipino family. The phrase translates to “debt of one’s inner self” and it’s a cultural value that reminds Filipino sons and daughters to reciprocate their gratitude- in simpler terms: they owe their family. And while a Filipino’s love language is sacrificing, is this actually a good tradition to uphold, most especially for the next generations? Growing up in an immigrant family comes with all sorts of pressure and it’s as if from the day of your birth, you were already being prepared to create a better life not just for yourself but for your family too. This is a form of “love” that Filipinos teach each other but actually comes across as debatable.

While utang na loob is practiced by several different kinds of relationships, we see this most in familial settings. One concrete example is choosing practicality over passion when taking up careers because your parents want you to be financially secure and well enough to be able to repay them. Another is leaving them behind just so you can provide for them as an immigrant or an OFW. Making a living in the Philippines itself is not easy and the unemployment rate is twice as high as it is in the US, which is why so many locals go abroad to earn money and send it back to their loved ones. Keep in mind that in the Philippines, households are usually multi-generational and so everyone needs to be taken care of.

However, what isn’t often talked about is how OFWs are expected to deal with poor living conditions, discrimination from their bosses as well as racism in their working countries, and the trauma of being separated from their families for such a long time. By just commending them on their sacrifice and for ‘doing the right thing’ - we also pretend that there’s no way we can fix these miserable conditions. Ultimately, being able to call out these working conditions is a privilege in itself. Right now, for many Filipinos, sending their loved ones abroad is the only option they have for sustaining their families. And for the Philippines, this supports the economy. So yes, sacrifice IS necessary when you’re a Filipino.

Every generation has its defining moment that pays it forward for the next generation - so what will ours be? Do we break the pattern or do we keep it going? Is “utang na loob” a toxic mindset or motivating value? As the new batch of immigrant children, we are privileged to have our own options now thanks to those who came before us. It’s up to us now on how our future is going to look and what we will be working hard towards.

Want to dive in to more about Filipino family culture? You can check out more discussions like this through One Down’s original series “Breaking The Tabo”.